ponder

Woah what a year! Instead of fear, I hope everyone is vibrating in higher consciousness and emanating love. For love ❤️ is the opposite of fear. I think 2020 is quite a good year for me. Time moves in a smooth manner as in it didn’t feel too fast or too slow. Ngam-ngam!

In March, Malaysia went into lockdown together with some countries due to a contagious virus. Fast forward 9 months later, we are still restricted but with looser & ever-changing SOPs. Like everyone else, I was worried and afraid but only initially. My fear lasted for about 2-3 weeks. Once I woke up to the truth, everything changes. I tried helping by sharing on social media. Many must have thought this girl is nuts. Don’t care, I still share. You see, once you see it, you can’t unsee it and you want everyone else to see it too!

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Wah, can’t believe I’m a week late blogging about my 2019. Truth to be told, I fell ill a day after Christmas and never felt like my healthy grounded self even until today. There are lingering cough, sore throat, mouth ulcers and stomach discomfort, all which I know are detox symptoms.

Anyway, here’re how my 2019 fare…

This year flew by slowly. The slowest I’ve ever felt in recent decades. It was quite a good year.

I continued where I left off at 2018 in 2019. I dug into my inner world, find out how I operate from the programmings which I downloaded unconsciously (there were lots of fear-based living & thinking), learn to talk to my inner child, learn to listen to my gut/intuition (I’ve got it right quite a few times! It’s usually the first thought that comes up, very positive and tell you straight. If it’s fear-based, then it’s the ego), learn to listen to my body, learn about boundary and implement it, learn to think positively and practice gratefulness.

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According to my mind, this year has more downs than ups for me. Perhaps my spirit/soul will beg to differ very strongly. LOL I did some of the things that were scary to me. And while they may or may not yielded any benefits, I know I’ve gained confidence through it. Turns out, there is nothing to be afraid of, only overthinking on minuscule stuff. Yes, I know I’ve talked about it before, and I’m still learning about the overthinking matter. In terms of speed, it’s a moderate year for me. I didn’t find it going by too fast or too slow. Just good enough for me. Is this a good sign then?

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How’s my 2017?

I think it was a neutral year for me. Lots of ups, and also lots of downs. And this is what life is all about. 😏 All the hardships and fun days are priceless lessons, especially failures. This year, I spent a large bulk of my time learning who I really am, and why I am the way I am.

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2016 have been good to me.

Mmm let me rephrase it: I work hard to make 2016 a good year to live in. At the end of the day, I think I succeeded.

I’m calmer, more positive and have rebounded with new energy. Not all 365 days are bed of roses and I try not to let negativity affect me too badly or deeply. Sometimes it does affect me more than I could handle (I’m only human) and giving myself a pep talk is the best way to bounce back. I’m grateful for all the ups and downs I experienced this year. From it, I learned a lot.

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